Lustee Erotica

Too Many Choices?

2011-09-14T18:44:00.000-07:00

I find that I deal with choice anxiety everyday. There are really too many options for everything.   What type of music do I want to listen too? What do I want to watch on the TV? With the Pandora’s and Netflix’s of the world, we can watch or listen to virtually anything and everything.
    When I get in my car in the morning before driving to work, I pull out the IPhone and spend at least 5 minutes trying to determine what in all the worlds music am I in the mood to listen to?! It’s a beautiful thing on one hand to have access to so much art but I’m aways concerned that I’m going to make the wrong call. Halfway to work I’ll think to myself, no I wasn’t really in the mood for this. Damn, wasted time.     We got rid of cable in my house in attempt to watch less TV. Holy shit, have seen how much stuff is on Netflix?   It’s incredible.
    This problem of too many choices even affects my photography post processing. I can choose any styling for this great shot. ANY! Which one is best? Fuck! So many of them are great!
    I’ve been reading some articles and listening to TED talks about the subject and it is interesting that in many cases, people with few choices are just as happy or happier in life than people with all the choice in the world. It all comes from within of course and we need to stop chasing the idealistic future of what is new unless it is truly revolutionary. My new goal in life is just to be content, learn more about myself and truly know what I like without the influence of others and trying to live some lifestyle. Everything is just fucking fine the way it is and the way you are. You have a great life, enjoy what you like…blah blah blah. And exhale….

See this blog entry from James Shelley which says much of this way more eloquently than I can.
http://www.jamesshelley.net/2011/08/choice-anxiety/

Where's My Stuff?

2011-09-09T08:18:00.000-07:00

Be sure to check out my work online. Prepare to be amazed....or mildly interested.

For my short erotic films: *Got to pay for these but it's worth it.

http://clips4sale.com/40036

For my stills portfolio:

http://www.flickr.com/photos/breninhurley/

and

http://www.modelmayhem.com/1491584

I'm also on Tumble and twitter:

http://breninhurley.tumblr.com/

http://twitter.com/breninhurley

A comprehensive website will be available soon as it is currently under construction.

Thanks for taking a look.

Brenin Hurley

Relax Your Face

2011-09-09T06:27:00.000-07:00

As I was sitting in a meeting earlier this week, I started to notice the tensions and stresses that people wear on their faces. It looks like the stress has been there so long that permanent creases and wrinkles have developed in these areas. This got me thinking about how when I meditate, my first physical response to the practice is a relaxed sensation in all the muscles of my face. I started looking around and noticed people everywhere, even is supposedly relaxed situations, keep tension in their faces. Some people do it so much they actually look a little ridiculous. With these observations in hand, I decided to practice some awareness of my own facial tension and started to note the times in which my face was tense. This always coincided with me being tense or anxious about whatever. Most of the time I barely realized the intensity of the tension I was carrying until I really slowed down to look at it. So I decided to turn the tables and actively relax my face when I notice this tension. This had quite a profound affect on the rest of my senses and sensibilities as I would become quite relaxed all over. You know how smiling can make you feel better by triggering certain physiological responses due to an association of good times? I feel this is the same function but on a deeper level where your whole mind and body start to relax. So try it next time you notice you are feeling a bit tense or anxious and see it helps. Consciously relax the muscles in your face while watching your breathing and feel everything come back to normal. Also, look around at everyone else you run into during the day. All their pent up energy is quite obvious once you stop to notice it. And is a constant source of inspiration to not do it yourself.
BH

Who is Brenin Hurley and what is he doing here?

2011-09-08T07:59:00.000-07:00

    It took me a long time to get to this place. This place where all is right and all is righteous…my brothers and sisters. It started with a need for change.    After working low end jobs since I was of legal age, I though I’d give it a go at something more substantial. I wanted money. Actually, I wanted that lifestyle that money provided. I wanted to stop having to save for things, to travel on a whim and eat out with little thought to costs. And I did it. I went to school on my uncle’s dime and got that job and excelled at it.   I became successful in the corporate world! Oh wait, the corporate word is a dirty rotten place where people go to die only hoping to be redeemed by their children who end up in the same place. I’m not happy here. My effort did serve at least one purpose. It was the first time I had really accomplished anything at all. I barely escaped high school and did nothing of much after.   It was a surprise to me to make it this far at all. But once you get to this precipice, this lofty goal of making the good money you die for everyday, it grants you the perspective of “now what?”. It’s good to do this early in life. So I’m making a comfortable living and working toward a long retirement followed by a hopefully timely death when luckily through a passing interest in meditation, I was able to slow down a second and really think about this train of time slipping by. I think about the things I love; women, the outdoors, good wine, etc… I spend 10 hours a day in a place where these things do not exist and would not be tolerated. Why would I want to stay here any longer? To continue to stroke my ego? My boss says I’m so smart, communicative and a team player!
    After a decade or so of this, I run into a camera. You know, one of those nice cameras where you tell yourself, there’s no way I could learn how to use that. The technical aspects are daunting enough before you can even think about being artistic. Another shit-head taking pictures. Good job, you create mediocre crap like everyone else who halfheartedly picks up a camera. Well I ran with it anyway, despite my cynicism.   I felt I could grasp it technically at least. In my corporate career, I learned that most people in this world are pretty fucking stupid. People in positions in which they need to be smart. So I figured if these people can function at all in life, I should be able to learn this camera. So I did. And with the help of some good books, and professionals graciously spewing their knowledge of the subject all over the Internet, I learned it well. I could do anything with it. This, I feel is a powerful propellant into the creative realm. Knowing the ins and outs of exposure and such, I was free to explore a world of my own broken rules and run free. People liked my work, stroking my ego again but I really enjoyed this on a personal level. It might have been mediocre crap but it was my mediocre crap. Of course the next step is asking yourself the question; can I make any money at this? Sure, I can shoot what anybody else does. I attended a photography business course and I’m good with people. So what do I want to shoot? What do I want to shoot? What do I want to shoot? Multiply that by a million and that’s how many times I asked myself that question. I dabbled in landscape, portrait, and product. Never was I moved or really proud of my work. It was good but that was it. So we move into fashion. Ok, here we got something. The surreal looks of fashion are inspiring and have no boundaries. And of course the women were incredible. But I still found myself wanting more. It took a long time before I could admit it to myself. What was missing? Why do I feel let down even after the most beautiful shot? I wanted exposure.   I don’t really care about apparel or accessories. I love the women. I love their skin, eyes, personalities, everything. I wanted to be exposed to all of that in the most revealing and intimate way. I want to swim it that sweet feminine essence. Once I was able to admit this to myself, I explored nudes in a cautious way. I am really too cautious about most things. The Aquarian in me keeps me from diving in.   So I complete my first real nude shoot and wow, I felt like the portrayal of Dexter’s character after he slays a killer. So much peace and gratification. I can feel it flow through my body. I shoot again and again pushing the explicitness of each shoot until finally realizing that the launching point of everything I will ever know in the future is what we label as pornography. Pornography done right is one of the most beautiful things in the world. There are few moments in life where your breath can be taken away at a moments notice. Children and the Grand Canyon not with standing.
    So that’s how we got here. Everyone in my head is on board with the truth and we are ready to embark on this journey of a lifetime. My next entry will be about what I plan to do now that I’m here and who has influenced me along the way.
Brenin Hurley